Q: From Dave le Douche in Quebec, Canada

“Moritz, have you ever had sex with a minor?”

Moritz – “I can confirm that I have never had sex with anyone associated with the coal industry.”

Jim – “Moritz, I don’t think Dave means that.”

Moritz – “All those coal particles on my Steifen. I would find that too uncomfortable.”

Jim – “Have you really no idea Moritz?”

Moritz – “I think I did once have a blow job from a woman who worked in the automotive industry.”

Jim – “can we have the next question please?”

Q: From Kevin Kack in Southwark, Nr London, UK

“Hi guys, how many women have you slept with in your career?”

Jim – “For me I would conservatively say minimum 2,000 but not at the same time.

In fact, my main boast is that I’ve had sex with 2,000+ women and had about three wanks in my career.”

Moritz – “for me it’s the opposite. In my career I’ve slept with about three women and probably had 2,000+ masturbations.”

Q: From Gurt Moeller in Karlsruhe, Germany

Moritz, did you celebrate Remembrance Day in the UK, this year?

Moritz – “Of course, it’s an opportunity to reflect and think about of all those who suffered and died in defending against the tyrannical dictatorship that swept through Europe in the 1940’s.”

Jim – Yeah, Adolf Hitler’s!”

Moritz – “No, Winston Churchill’s”

Jim – “Er, Moritz, I think you’re somehow wrong here.”

Moritz –“Should we consider Chamberlain’s dictatorship also?”

Jim – “Next question please”

Q:From Manfred, in Geneva, Switzerland.

“Hello, my name is Manfred Kuentz. I’m a fairly shit hot guitarist, however I think with my name I’ve no chance of achieving international success. Can you please advise me on what options I have?”

Jim – “You’ve got no chance with that name. You know the guitarist Slash? Yeah him, well his real name was Dennis Urine. A quick change of name and see what happens? If I were you, I’d change your name to Manfred Vagina, or something like that. Good luck!”

Q: From Glenn Pillock in Baltimore, USA

“You guys always criticise players like Steve Vai, Eddie van Halen and Joe Satriani, for playing what you describe as twiddly nonsense. Why don’t you ever refer to tapping techniques? Are you unable to play to this style? I thought you guys were supposed to be guitar gods?”

Moritz – “I’m glad you mention this as Ill be bringing out a new instructional DVD in the New Year covering mainly tapping techniques. Believe me, it will blow you away. In my opinion, this will set the benchmark for the next 5 years. If you’re technically crap, please don’t waste you money on this, as it will be way too advanced for most of you. Speak with you soon.”

 Jim – “See you soon everyone”

 Q: Reg Pinkehurst from Surrey asks:

What's this about you guesting with Deep Purple at the Astoria in January 06?

Jim: The trouble with the internet is the amount of rumours that spread around the globe.  Some have their basis in fact and some are just complete nonsense.  I think we might be coming to some agreement with the band, but Moritz has insisted he'll do it only if they agree to play the whole of "The Book of Taliesyn" album, so you'll have to wait and see.  Obviously getting us involved is likely to boost ticket sales, so we would like to have an impact on the proceedings.

Q: Giovanni Smythe from Bologna asks:

Tell us a bit about the output on the new album, Village Idiot, will it form a similar progression that Inserted Gently and Mallard took?

Moritz: Adelangst have always been a progressive band, but we are not actually a progressive rock band, we just simply progress down a path that is clear to us rather than act progressively.  

Q: Ivar Uzak from Istanbul asks:
What media formats will the new album take.  Will you do a SACD or DVD-Audio version? 

Jim: There will be a CD, which will be round with a hole in the middle, a bit like vinyl used to be.

Q; Lata Euarly from Cyprus asks:

Obviously I’m really excited about the new album Jim, What are some of the new songs called?

Jim: I can’t remember exactly.  We’ve got “Bring your door to the Slaughter”, which is one of Moritz’s songs about an experience he had during the early 80’s.  Another is called ITV which his all about the battle between Blue Peter and Magpie in the 1970’s, although this track will only be available on the limited edition vinyl copy to be released in certain cities in Poland with the Sunday edition of “Die Spzurt” magazine.

Also we are working on a sequel to the song Toe Grabber, called Toe Grabber Too, good eh!

Q: Hiegh Kwiskquiot from Israel asks:

Will the new album get a general world release at the same time?

Moritz: No, we plan to phase the release around the world.  Our new record company Boulevard records plans to do slightly different versions of the CD in each country, therefore making it difficult for bootleggers.  Also it means that our really keen fans have to buy loads of versions of the CD which apparently is something they like to do. 

Q: Poli Wedling from Edinburgh asks

I noticed on the recent tour that the same group of fans always appeared to be on the front row.  Is this something you arranged with them?

Moritz: Absolutely not!  We get really fedup performing to the same people all the time, especially as they are anticipating what we do.  We also have to be nice and say hi to them from the stage and mention their names, but really we can’t bear them.  These guys are always around us, and although we like the attention it does get a bit much when they want to be with you the whole time and document everything you do and say.  Sometimes indeed I think one or two of the fans would only be happy if they lived with me and documented everything I do.  Y’know, at Ten O’clock he went for a pee.  This is 10 minutes different from yesterday but only 5 minutes different from the day before.  Let’s have a discussion on the Internet about all this and argue about it with other fellow lunatic fans around the world..... that sort of thing.

Q: Geoff White from Wolverhampton asks:

Hey Moritz, loved the UK gigs, I also went all the way to the USA to see you, did you see me at the Cal Jam?  I was on the third turn?

Moritz: Hi Geoff, great to hear from you.  Oh yes of course we did notice you on the third turn.  Don’t forget to buy all the versions of the new CD Geoff and bring them along to be signed when we next make a public appearance.

Q: Nic Branch from Surrey asks:

When will the sheet music for Mallard be coming out?

Jim: Oh Next year I think Nic.

Q: Buylor Ciejje from Slovenia asks:

Are there any rare recordings due out next year?

Jim: yes we have quite a lot of activity on this front.  First of all there is a box set of our famous German shows from 1982, in Cologne, Dusseldorf and Nurnberg.  The setlist for each gig was exactly the same, but the concerts were all fantastic, and well worth owning.  The Japanese are planning to issue the lot in a costly box set around April.  The Belgians are going to release one CD a week over the month of May.  The French are going to advertise them first by putting posters up around Paris and other major cities.  The Germans themselves are going to release single CD tracks every month for a few years before actually putting the album out as a whole.  In the UK we are likely to see a special import being available through the usual selling agencies Finally in the USA there is gong to be a vinyl only version of the record, booked for June 2012.  So if you want to be the first to own this fantastic collection you need to really buy the Japanese copy, and then the rest later.

Q: Lord Wayne of Broxham-on-Sea asks:

Are you chaps still intending to do the “Intensities in Ten Sitting rooms” tour announced in 2004.  I have a very large sitting room that will do, and my daughter loves Status Quo

Moritz:  Listen my Lord, Status Quo are cabaret, they do medleys of their old songs live, and the like.  The only medleys you’ll find Adelangst dong are those involving several different types of girl or amplification equipment, but never the music mate, no way.  We are considering a Celebrity version of the tour next year where we play at Celebrity’s houses.

Q: Penshaw Bonerk from Ontario asks

Do you like any of the new music that’s out today?

Jim: well I like the new music we’re making but I don’t really know much about the new stuff.  I’ve heard Coldplay with some guy moaning and whinging on about things.  Doesn’t sound like much fun to me.  That Robbie Williams guy keeps cropping up as well.  People go completely crazy every time he appears on television, even before he’s done or sung a thing.  To me he looks like the kind of chap you find working at motorway service station café.  Can’t understand it myself.

Q: Cark Monnolly from Ipswich asks

Moritz, Is it true that back in the early 1990’s you nearly joined Deep Purple when Ian Gillan and Ritchie Blackmore had another fall out and Jon Lord had just seen Adelangst perform in London and tried to get the other band members interested but they were too busy to take notice so instead they decided to get rid of Ian Gillan for the while but then later when Ian rejoined the band you had a formal invitation to tour with the band and get to know the songs just in case Ritchie decided to leave but in the end the band wanted a twiddey widdly guitarist so chose Joe Satriani instead?

Moritz: no.

Q: Richard Browning of Reading asks
Will a DVD of the Cal Jam be released?  Being a famous fan, I was there on the day and I noticed some cameras at the event.

Jim:  Famous fan?  I’ve never heard of you.  You have to hang around a bit more net time Richard to be classed as a famous fan, try coming to each gig in the front row and books yourself into the same hotel as the band, that usually helps.  Anyway, the Cal Jam was a very difficult event to film, with Moritz and I being taken around the circuit on motorbikes.  Indeed it was quite difficult to play the guitar as well.  We couldn’t get a stage monitor fixed up to work properly in the cockpit of these bikes and we couldn’t hear a feed on our mobile phones because they weren’t loud enough, so we just had to start off a song near the stand where Steele, Bob and Malcolm were playing statically, and hope for the best as we sped off around the circuit.  At one stage Moritz and I were still in the middle of Toe Grabber and as we came along the straight to where the static members of the band were playing we suddenly noticed that they had already started off the next song in the setlist, “The Mole”.  I suppose it serves us right for going for an extended guitar solo without being able to indicate this to the rhythm section.  That aside it was really quite an event, with all our American fans clapping and cheering us around the circuit.  As for the filming, we had some on board cameras which were operating at the time, although they tended to look outwards rather than inwards towards me and Moritz.  We’ve seen the footage and I have to admit that it looks a bit chaotic.  It seems like on each lap Moritz and I completely forgot what was going on and the audience seem a bit confused as well.  Altogether it’s just another screw up by our now infamous touring agent.  I suppose we might release a DVD eventually, but it might take 31 years to get it right what with all the camera angles to look at!

Read the Webchat from February 2005